Here’s where I bitch about fashion

No one has ever accused me of being stylish or fashionable. I have to wear suits to work every day, and they tend to be either grey, tan or black. I have two deviations from this color scheme – a purple blazer with a mandarin collar and three-quarter sleeves that I wear with a black skirt and an either pale pink or white top, and a dark, burgundy suit from New York and Company. Yeah, I’m not particularly original, but I’m in a leadership role, so I need to present a certain appearance. I’m fairly certain that if I came to work in a pair of leggings and a torn t-shirt, no one would take me seriously.

Is that shallow? Probably.

But your appearance says a lot about you. It’s a fact. You can be the brightest, most well-read, most intelligent person in the room, but if you look like the poster child for the filthy hippie movement, the only thing people will notice is the moldy odor wafting from your armpits and the greasy tinge to your hair.

Sorry, but that’s a fact.

That’s why I keep wondering whether masculinity is dead, and whether strong, intelligent men are becoming a thing of the past. What kind of self-respecting man would wear this?

omg

Look, you want to cross dress, that’s your business, but wear this ridiculous looking shit to work, and I don’t know of anyone who would take you seriously! Sorry dudes, but it’s true. The androgyny is a distraction. It screams, “I HAVE NOTHING ELSE, SO I’M DRESSING FOR ATTENTION!” And it’s ugly, quite frankly. If you’re going to cross dress, go all out and look good. Not like… well… this.

Givenchy-Spring-2012-menswear

This does not say leadership.

This does not say strength.

This says, “I have no idea what I am.”

This says, “I can’t decide what I want to be.”

This says, “I don’t give a crap if people respect my ideas or my intellect, as long as they are fascinated and wondering about my sexuality.”

This says, “I’m not a man.”

OK, if you’re not a man, then don’t be one. But don’t pretend to be a man when you’re clearly dressed like a woman and then go out in public and demand respect. Sorry, but if I can’t figure out what you are, and I’m too distracted trying to figure it out, I’m not going to care much about what you say. Sorry, but that’s how it is.

We had this person where I used to work. In transition. I honestly have no problem with this, as you all know. But if you’re going to become a woman, then be a WOMAN, ferpetessake! That means shave your damn legs if you’re wearing stockings. Dress with class, not like a worn out tranny whore! If you’re at work, wear a suit or at the very least something business casual, instead of dressing like a color-blind hooker. And ferpetessake, shave the facial hair! If you’re going to be a woman, dress like a woman, instead of a man who is pretending to be a woman, and then demand to be addressed in the feminine!

Whatever you choose, when you’re at work, dress professionally… that’s all I ask, eh?

A site in September asked the same question: What does feminine male fashion say about men? They have another take.

Feminised male fashions have an adverse effect on masculinity and males by extension. Masculinity is important to our species and fashion serves a tool in fulfilling our purpose. A simple example: the right clothes make a woman feel desirable and more open to the opposite sex. In the same way, great masculine style adds to the sexual confidence a man needs to walk up to that woman, get a phone number and preserve the yin and yang of the universe.

Look, they’re right. There’s a difference between men and women. There’s a reason for this.  And before you bitch me out, I do understand there are folks out there who were born into the wrong bodies, etc. I get that. I get that there are folks out there undergoing a transition. But you can still dress like a man if you’re a man and a woman if you’re a woman – and do so tastefully – not as a statement or a plea for attention.

Speaking of which…

Rob and I went to Lobby Day yesterday in Richmond. As Chair of the Virginia Republican Liberty Caucus, Rob spoke to numerous legislators about issues important to liberty Republicans this session. I joined him, because I like to watch him work, and because I’m a pretty great wife. There were scores of people lobbying for various issues in Richmond yesterday, including several hundred gun rights advocates, promoting our Second Amendment.

I appreciate they turned out in droves. Legislators need to hear from their constituents. However… Let’s talk about clothing. Now, I’m not saying people need to wear suits to Lobby Day. Rob did, and he looked fantastic and professional, but he’s the head of a statewide organization, so it made sense. But come on, people! Greasy hair, dirty, worn jeans, stretched out “Don’t tread on me!” t-shirts? Really?

You would not believe the fashion faux pas disasters I saw yesterday! Woman in bright, and I mean bright, fuchsia suit and matching heels, looking like a weird, disturbingly off-color walking vaj you needed sunglasses to behold! But hey, at least she wore a suit!

The building was also filled with Duck Dynasty rejects, wearing everything from camouflage outfits with matching baseball caps to leather biker attire. Many looked like they hadn’t washed for weeks, with ratty hair and beards like they looked like they contained leftovers from several trips to White Castle.

And don’t get me started on the toothless dude in what looked like unwashed blue jeans and a gargantuan, glittery Uncle Sam chapeau open carrying his pistol.

Would a clean shirt – a button down or even a polo shirt – have been too much, people? Maybe a nice sweater? Would a pair of jeans without a gigantic hole in the pocket worn by whatever you’ve been carrying in there be a tough order? How about not looking like an escaped circus clown when lobbying your legislators for what you want?

I know not everyone can afford a three-piece suit. I understand some folks have limited wardrobes. But you can get a pair of khakis and a shirt with a collar at WalMart, or simply take a damn shower before speaking to your legislator. Take your damn hat off indoors. How do you expect to be taken seriously if you look like a demented, well-armed Cat in the Hat?

Perpetuating the stereotype that gun owners are sloppy, classless, attention-whoring rednecks is not doing us any favors, people.

Maybe it’s shallow. I don’t care. Yes, it’s what’s on the inside that counts. But don’t expect your legislators to be oh-so open-minded and profound. You come to their office looking like you rolled out of your trailer park abode, threw on a pair of whatever smelled freshest from the floor and came over to promote your rights, and I guarantee you they will either laugh at you or forget about you.

Sorry, but that’s life. That’s reality.

Let the flaming begin.

14 responses

  1. Once upon a time, when I was getting out, I was working with a personnel agency that specialized in Junior Officers.

    5 of us came to the interview/meeting. Two of us in “uniform”: Blue blazer, white button-down, red tie, grey slacks, and wingtips. The others were in polo shirts and T-shirts: one came wearing shorts and flip-flops.

    Guess which two advanced to the next stage. And oddly enough, both of us had gone through the same Army ROTC detactment. Where the Professor of Military Studies had an ADDITIONAL reading list for ROTC scholarship students. That list included “Dress for Success”. . . .

    Like

    1. But… but… but… I’m so smart and awesome, and people need to see past my appearance to my brilliance!

      Like

  2. Can’t disagree with any of this, Nicki. I usually go to work in nice slacks and a polo shirt that compliments the slacks. If I’m being interviewed for a job, I wear either a suit or at least a shirt, tie and sport coat. (I NEVER wear jeans–except jean shorts on the golf course sometimes.) I’ve never been interviewed for a job that I didn’t get. If I’m attending a meeting with an attorney, banker or some corporate CEO for ANY purpose, I wear at a minimum, that slacks/shirt/tie/sportcoat combination. It may be WRONG, but people don’t take you seriously unless you DRESS seriously. BTW, I turned 72 last Friday and am retiring March 1st.

    Like

    1. I do wear jeans, but definitely not to meetings or work! Good lord. Yesterday at Lobby Day I wore a very nice pair of jeans, a sweater and Mary Jane shoes. I wasn’t lobbying. I was simply there to accompany Rob. But I certainly didn’t look like a pig. The guy in the Cat in the Hat getup just about killed me!

      Oh, and congrats on the retirement!

      Like

  3. I am always stunned by what I see worn at funerals, weddings, etc. I’m no fashion plate but I do know when proper attire is called for. The nice thing is, I no longer worry whether I am “under dressed” at any function. There are always plenty of people who make me look good.

    Like

  4. You won’t get any flames from me. I have been a Bible study leader/teacher and one of the first things they mentioned at training is to dress like you’re going to a business meeting, or if it’s a casual atmosphere, dress at least one degree more formally than the folks attending the Bible study. It certainly adds to credibility. Of course I had already picked up on that from my days in the military. It amazes me that so many people don’t have someone to grab them by the arm and say, “You’re not going out dressed like THAT, are you?” My mother would have handed my head to me if I had attempted to wear much of what I see out of the house. But hey, in this job market, self-eliminators are not necessarily a bad thing.

    Like

  5. why did I get the mental image of those models dying in a tragic gasoline fight accident?

    Like

  6. I know cross-dressers who wouldn’t be caught dead in those abortions.

    Like

    1. I do too.

      You should see the one at my former job! GOOD LORD! I seriously wanted to drag her clothes shopping. She was so unfortunately dressed all the time (along with the facial and leg hair), that you couldn’t help but laugh!

      Like

  7. Hey! I like White Castle…
    Alex

    Like

  8. I’m fairly sure Walt Disney just coughed up a furball, I’d really like to know just how much alcohol was consumed to get those models to wear that. It’s sure going to put a dent in their ability to do little things like being seen in public, date and generally be taken seriously. I’m so glad I’m stuck in a uniform for a while longer.

    Like

    1. Date? Hell, they’ll never get laid! EVER!

      Like

    2. Well come to think of it, …. that is a plus. So good things can come from bad fashion after all. Now if I can just find the eye bleach.

      Like

  9. Dress like a bum, get treated like a bum.

    Like

%d bloggers like this: