A special kind of retard

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There’s little in this world that pisses me off more than worthless sacks of smelly refuse impersonating heroes. These maggots are in line right behind those who abuse children, animals and the elderly. They impersonate service members for glory, or free stuff, or street cred, or an ego boost, but they either haven’t served, served but couldn’t hack it, or exaggerate their service in order to make themselves appear more glamorous.

The guys at This Ain’t Hell have done a great job exposing (and ridiculing) these losers.  Some of these tools are just too ridiculous to exist!  Some of them are just so pathetic, it’s painful to read. Some of them, like this obese bag of syphilitic cocks, are so foul, they would actually don a uniform and impersonate service members on Veterans’ Day to get free stuff. This is actually a guy I would like to find and curb stomp until there’s nothing left of him but an adipose stain. It’s tough for me to believe that anyone would mistake this gelatinous lardass for an actual member of the military – past or present – but he claims he gets free food.  And from the looks of it, he eats it. By the metric fuckload.

Fat Bastard

And then there’s this sad bit of female flesh.

Apparently she’s a Lieutenant in the… sit down for this… SPECIAL FORCES!

Oh, yeah… this one’s a gem.  Let’s forget for a brief moment that there are no women serving in the SF, no matter what that GI Jane movie tells you! But she’s apparently an XO or something – at least that’s what her job description is, according to specialoperations.com.

Executive Officer.

The Executive Officer (XO) plans and conducts training and operations in foreign internal defense, unconventional warfare, direct action, special reconnaissance, and (if specially trained) counter-terrorism. He advises the commander on all matters pertaining to task organization and preparation/execution of operation plans and contingency plans from higher headquarters. Formulates policies and procedures, and prepares and issues battalion operations orders. Supervises all aspects of the battalion collective training and certification program.

Does that sound familiar? Especially since she didn’t bother changing the tenses of her verbs to make herself sound at least somewhat legitimate.

united states amry
Lieutenant, Special Forces

I plan and conduct training and operations for foreign internal defense, unconventional warfare, direct action, special reconnaissance, and counter-terrorism. I advises the commander on all matters pertaining to task organization and preparation/execution of operation plans and contingency plans from higher headquarters. Formulates policies and procedures, and prepares and issues battalion operations orders. Supervise all aspects of the battalion collective training and certification programs.

A closer look at the profile suggests that she graduated Yale, and studied International Criminal Law.  Impressive, isn’t she?  Except apparently there is no International Criminal Law course of study at Yale. And I think… don’t quote me on this, because I’m not sure… but I think you actually have to be literate to attend Yale.

Wow. This one’s a peach.

She might be the first person DOJ arrests after lying on sites like Match.com and Facebook become crimes.

The law in question, the Computer Fraud and Abuse Act, has been used by the Justice Department to prosecute a woman, Lori Drew, who used a fake MySpace account to verbally attack a 13-year old girl who then committed suicide. Because MySpace’s terms of service prohibit impersonation, Drew was convicted of violating the CFAA. Her conviction was later thrown out.

What makes this possible is a section of the CFAA that was never intended to be used that way: a general-purpose prohibition on any computer-based act that “exceeds authorized access.” To the Justice Department, this means that a Web site’s terms of service define what’s “authorized” or not, and ignoring them can turn you into a felon.

I’m not even going to delve into the irony of a DOJ that wants to prosecute idiots for lying on dating and social network sites, but thinks it’s perfectly acceptable to lie to Congress about funneling guns to Mexican drug cartels.

I realize this daft bint likely thinks her little game is harmless, but I see nothing harmless in impersonating heroism and claiming valor that does not belong to you.

And ferpetessake, at least learn to spell “Army!”

h/t: This Ain’t Hell

Being prey is a choice…

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The photos are undeniably Oleg Volk.

The story is real.

I damn every politician and every hoplophobe for endeavoring to disarm her! I’m sickened at the thought of those who say she should have waited for the police to arrive!

And I shudder to think there are people out there who would choose to die, or let their loved ones die, rather than use the most effective tool of self defense on the market today to take responsibility for their own lives.

h/t: David Codrea

Is it me?

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Am I being overly sensitive lately, or has the world really turned into something hideous?

I mean, it feels like it’s raining down crap!

I know I should be grateful for what I have – wonderful friends, a terrific boyfriend, best kids I could ever hope for, a career that is so rewarding, I actually LOVE coming to work every morning, house, car, cats, parents, an awesome credit score… I’m grateful for all that. Really.

But all the good stuff in my life seems to be this huge umbrella that is keeping me clean as the shit storm comes down.

A legendary Penn State football coach is caught in the shower raping a kid. A KID! A child! And then proclaims his innocence and says that “maybe” he shouldn’t have showered with children. WTF? Why?

Zero squanders an opportunity to help create real jobs in the United States and to help increase our energy supply, so we’re not paying ridiculous amounts of money just to be able to get to work every morning. WTF? Why?

Parents are actually soliciting germs from strangers in order to infect their children in an effort to create a “natural immunity” to preventable diseases! Disease! From people they don’t know!  WTF?  Why?

Filthy hippies are infesting our cities. They don’t have a purpose. Some of them don’t even know what they’re protesting. Many of them are making demands that are so ludicrous, that they should be laughed off the national stage! Instead they’re being given media time, even as many of them demand that your earnings be stolen and given to them, and your hard work be appropriated and redistributed. They’re bringing filth, disease, crime and violence with them. WTF?

A good friend, who lives healthy, who is young and productive and vibrant and sweet, got cancer. Bad cancer (not that there’s any such thing as “good” cancer) that will prevent her from ever having children of her own – something that was important to her – and is making her go through hellish chemo. Why? I don’t get it. With no family history and low risk factors, how does someone like that get afflicted with something so horrible? She’s a fighter, and she’ll kick cancer’s ass. But I still don’t get it.

Another person, who I thought was a good friend, just cut off all communication with me. I tried to ask why. Several times. To no avail. No reply. Not even an acknowledgment. I have to assume it’s something I said or did, because this person is not the type to just toss a friendship. But maybe I’m wrong. Maybe I’ve been wrong for several years. Maybe I’m a horrid judge of character.  I don’t get that either.

I can’t get over the fact that the pool of candidates for President is so pathetic for next year. I also can’t believe the massive corruption in Congress that goes unaddressed by the majority of voters. I can’t believe people are actually considering voting for Newt, who despite being smart, is also an odious prick who’s left two sick wives for other women, who spent time on Nancy Pelosi’s envirowacko couch, who was for individual health care mandates before he was against them… How is this possible?

Europe is on the verge of collapse.  So is our economy.  Nothing is getting better, and I anticipate it will get worse before it gets better. I’m pessimistic.

I’m pessimistic about a lot of things.

Just venting.

 

PETArds attack Mario

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Apparently People Embarrassing the Tidewater Area (PETA) have nothing better to do with their free time. I’m sure the Occupy Whatever movement already has its share of drooling fruitcakes, so not to be outdone, PETA has decided it’s time to attack Mario.

No, not the new leader of Italy.

The video game.

They’re attacking the video game.

Tanooki may be just a “suit” in Mario games, but by wearing the skin of an animal, Mario is sending the message that it’s OK to wear fur. We created our game to help inform people that in real life, Mario would be wearing the skin of an animal who was beaten, strangled or electrocuted, and it wouldn’t give him any special powers other than the power of self-deception.

“Tanukis are real-life raccoon dogs who are beaten and, as PETA’s undercover exposés show, often skinned alive for their fur,” says PETA Executive Vice President Tracy Reiman. “This winter, everyone can give raccoon dogs and other fabulous animals a 1-UP by keeping our wardrobes fur-free.”

See, Mario is wearing some kind of Tanooki suit in some video game, and the PETArds are up in arms.

Ring! Ring!

Clue phone!

It’s a VIDEO GAME, dolts!

These are the same nitwits who protest the use of donkeys in bombings (ignoring the fact that innocent people are the actual targets), promote fish as “sea kittens,” advocate rescuing mice from glue traps and turning them into pets (never mind the diseases the vermin carry) and fund domestic terrorists, so I’m not surprised at this latest bit of dumbassery.

I just wish they’d keep their stupidity to themselves. I’m afraid it might be contagious.

Funny….

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Michelle Bachmann wasn’t complaining when Gary Johnson was unceremoniously kept out of nearly every debate.  Now, all of a sudden, she’s upset  about the media choosing the candidates?  Gee, I said that months ago.

“There’s always a suspicion of maybe a bias and I guess this just confirmed it,” she said of a CBS memo before Saturday’s debate, which suggested that the Minnesota Republican congresswoman would be ignored during the foreign policy chatfest.

The memo, she said, “demonstrates that the media wants to choose who our nominee will be and who the next president of the United States will be.”

For the record, I agree.  Every candidate should be given the opportunity to address the electorate, and the American people should decide.

So why is it that we wind up with two (for the most part) crappy choices every single election season?  Who really chooses the candidates?  Some of you will argue that the American public selects the candidates, which is technically true, but the American public is lazy.  The American public cannot make a selection unless it is staring them in the face from their hi-def television. Americans won’t research available candidates, unless that research involves being spoon-fed information by the pundits and news networks.  And they definitely won’t take the time to research a candidate whose name they have never heard before.

If they aren’t familiar with the name, why not?

That’s where the selection process is removed from the people.  The media decides who is a viable candidate and promotes only the candidates the mainstream establishment believes are worthy.  Pollsters decide whom to include in national surveys based on some nebulous criteria of “viability,” and the people never become fully informed on all the available candidates.

Wut iz our childrunz larnin?

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In a world where kids are apparently taught erroneous information about the concept of freedom and government, where school administrators try to prevent children from displaying the American flag for fear it will offend some illegal alien scum, where eco zealotry replaces real science, where schools attempt to suspend little kids for playing with Legos that happen to have a toy firearm and where education has gotten so watered down, that teachers are afraid to fail students for fear of hurting their little feelings, but would rather award them an “H,” one would think that an actress reading to a group of 1st graders would be welcomed.

Not so much.

We have parents in this country who refuse to even take a look at what their kids are learning at school, who demand that evolution be treated by schools as a “theory,” and creationism as “science,” and who demand that their Precious Punkins not be emotionally scarred by a failing grade, but who are enough familiar with the porn world that they complain about a former porn actress promoting reading to children.

Earlier Friday, news broke that  a Los Angeles area elementary school is facing some major criticism from parents after the district invited [Sasha] Grey to read to a group of first graders as part of the Read Across America program.

Until I read this story, I had no idea who Sasha Grey was, but apparently, she’s a “porn legend,” according to TMZ.

OK, whatever. She’s also quit the industry and transitioned to mainstream acting. Big deal.

Apparently it is to these parents, who are all bent out of shape that a girl who won the “2010 AVN award for best anal sex scene — was invited to read books to 1st graders at an L.A.-area elementary school last week.”

I have a question:  Did the school reveal to the tykes that Ms. Grey took it up the ass for adult entertainment? Did they identify her as a porn star? Would the 1st graders even know what porn is, or whether Ms. Grey was the one in the clip daddy was watching on his office computer?

Probably not.

What they did was invite a very pretty girl who (aside from having done porn) has also appeared in mainstream roles to read to a bunch of little kids – to promote literacy, which is something this nation desperately needs, judging by what kind of barely coherent assholes graduate publik skools these days.

Notice, she didn’t bring her dildo collection, her porn industry award or DVDs of her previous work.  As a matter of fact, what I see here is a pretty wholesome-looking girl enjoying some reading time with little kids.

How many Hollyweird stars take the time to do that?

And yet, parents, who apparently know who Sasha Grey is, have decided it’s wholly inappropriate to have her come read to their children.

To Ms. Grey’s credit, she refuses to back down and wants to continue to be a positive influence on children.

“I am an actor. I am an artist. I am a daughter. I am a sister. I am a partner. I have a past that some people may not agree with, but it does not define who I am.

“I believe in the future of our children, and I will remain an active supporter and participant in education-focused initiatives.”

And what I find even more appalling is that the school refuses to acknowledge that she was even there, despite photos obtained by TMZ such as the one above.

Cowards.

What I see is a young woman determined to turn her future around while helping others.

What these parents see is a porn star trying to corrupt their children.

What the school administrators see is a potential lawsuit from said clueless parents.

There’s only one player in this drama that I think has any character or integrity, and that’s the chick who got an award for taking it up the ass.

Go figure.

Patrick Murray for Congress

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For those of you who didn’t know, I moved this summer.  I packed up the munchkins, rented the house in Winchester, and moved to Arlington with Rob, the Redhead, Teeny, and the cats. Gilbert the dog went to a friend (you try to find a rental that will allow you to keep a large black lab for less than $4000 per month in the right school district!), and we got an awesome little house near Ballston.

With that move came the realization that I’m no longer a resident of the 10th district in Virginia. I’m now in the 8th, and my Congressman is….

Oh holy shit…

Jim Moran.

The same Jim Moran who compared the GOP to the Taliban, blamed them eeeeevil Jooos for the war in Iraq, treated a military veteran, who just happened to be a constituent, with disgusting disdain at a public townhall meeting and who supports every effort to redistribute wealth from those who work and create it, to those whom he deems either “needy,” or able to support his career.

Moran is to freedom and liberty what Rosie O’Donnell is to lingerie.

That’s why on this Veterans Day 2011, I am proud to announce my support for Col. (Ret) J. Patrick Murray for Virginia’s 8th Congressional District .

It’s not just because I feel a kinship with the guy. After all, he’s an Army combat veteran, he’s a Russian linguist, and has been stationed in some of the same places that were either home or deployed home to me throughout my life.

It’s not just because at this point, I’d vote for the crazy guy who stands on the median near Ballston mall, smoking a cigarette, hobbling around on a cane and yelling at motorists for spare change over Moran.

It’s because Murray has integrity, honor, courage and the strength and the charisma and determination to kick Moran’s ass next year.

Because while Murray was fighting for the freedoms we all treasure, Moran was working to dismantle them in Congress.

Because Murray beat up bad guys in combat, and Moran (allegedly, of course) beat on his wife and got into violent altercations with his fellow Congressmen.

And because while combat vet Murray isn’t threatened by anyone, Moran is apparently threatened by 8 year-old black kids.

I’ll delve more into Col. Murray as time goes on. I’m sure Rob will too.  For right now, however, I’m glad to see he intends to once again challenge Moran’s corrupt hold on this district.

We deserve better.

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